7 things you should know about being a poet

This was too funny to not share; from About.com:

7 Things You Should Know About Being a Poet: A List of Lists

My favorite so far (haven’t had time to read them all yet) is Michael Wells’ 3rd point:

Wells wrote:
People will think you are moody because you are a poet. This is not so. Even people who cannot write a single line of poetry can be moody anytime prior to their death.

So, here’s my list, after not much thought at all:

  • Writing poems will not solve your mental problems. On the contrary, it exacerbates the situation because people no longer doubt your insanity when they find out that you are a poet. This, in turn, makes you crazy because you have studied verse for over twenty years and it’s all for nothing.
  • Writing poetry can’t be used as an acceptable tax-deduction for all the paper you buy and throw in the trash. You’ve just got to bite the cost.
  • Lines in poems have a tendency to reproduce when you turn your back. Just when you thought you’d got the sucker down to ten lines it morphs into a sonnet. A bad sonnet.
  • Poems have a tendency to hide during April, napowrimo month, especially if you blog about them. Nothing you do will coax the damn things back out, except writing terrible limericks. Use this power wisely.
  • When people find out you write poems, they often want you to write something for their grandmother’s funeral. Resist the urge. Some great-uncle is always offended if the thing rhymes, and some other great-aunt is offended if it doesn’t. Quote from Dylan Thomas instead (“Do Not Go Gentle” is an amusing choice).
  • You will find your moral compass grows skewed when you’ve written poems long enough because you come to realize that most of your lines are stolen from something you read ten years ago. Of course, you can never recall the exact text. This also makes you crazy.
  • Finally, your ability to tell an iamb from a spondee will not get you free coffee, even if you quote from Shakespeare and perform the death scene from Romeo and Juliet while in line at the bookstore. Most people will assume you are homeless and try to get you thrown out.

  • .

    Shore

    Here’s an older poem of mine that I believe fits the new poem spark:

    Shore

    Against the clear light, the fresh touch of sky,
    the wind from the ocean filters sand into dunes,
    lights the tongues of waves that taste the people swimming.
    Each second a moment is washed ashore,
    ground white as sand and as clean
    though the water is green,
    and the dune grass is green
    and the seaweed on the few gray rocks is green
    as a swimsuit, wet as the far horizon in the noon hour,
    bright with the blue that blankets this side of the world,
    and lit with the rushing surf
    on the beach of a day
    precious and just as rare as a good dream.

    If you get to lie there and see it, this moment,
    if you get to wait until sunset and watch the sky turn midnight
    when there are more stars than specks of sand on the beach,
    on any beach on this world all put together,
    you might see a few constellations
    peer down: the belt of Orion,
    the arrow of Sagittarius that points to the wishes
    washed in with high tide.

    It is not as surprising as you think to see the stars.
    Across the earth a few of us notice and wonder
    and possibly across the galaxy where light foams against time
    to stretch into other systems
    there could be someone who sees stars
    at night, when their sun is asleep
    and their tides are low
    and the curtain of day has been swept aside
    by the turning of a planet no human has stepped on,
    where perhaps the sand is green
    and alive
    and made of trillions of creatures who wait for the next tide
    to wash them home to shore.

    The pornography of despair

    She begins each poem with tears. Like the end
    of a conversation where you have learned
    someone has died, the words leave you empty.
    Because she thinks her spirit has done the cruelest
    thing, leaving her hollow and sad, she has accepted
    the loneliness the way one accepts all tragedy: stoic
    and bitter, both. Memory stretches inside her thoughts
    but she pushes those voices away. They are the enemy
    and she will not speak to them. She is hungry but instead
    of food she eats medication. Refuses to look for peace.
    All things are in flux around her because her vision
    trembles in this grim atmosphere. The lack of permanence
    frightening. She denies herself the small joys and will not
    read about how the last bus stopped just in time
    on the dark road, missing the fawn fixed at the side
    in the light of the high beams. The lack of death
    is so disconcerting that her poem bleeds words
    into empty space, the lines filled eventually
    with strange and unreadable symbols. Sorrow
    repeated over and over until the voice of the poem
    flickers quietly into silence, the comfort of loss
    her only meaningful companion.

    © 2007 Christine Klocek-Lim